LinkedIn made me crash out
Updating my profile for while job searching gave me an identity crisis, but my freakout ended up being a good thing.
I did not expect that writing my LinkedIn headline would give me an identity crisis.
When I found myself unexpectedly on the job market last year, I did what any good job-searcher does: Reworked my LinkedIn profile. I pulled in all the metrics I could share publicly, put my copy writing skills to good use, got feedback from people I trusted.
Then I got to the headline. The part that shows up next to your name everywhere on the platform where you describe what you do.
A lot of people just use their job title here: “Manager of Strategic Busywork at Plont Solutions” or “Vice President of Questionable Business Strategies @ Qzynt.”
I used to do that, too, but since I no longer had a job, I needed to make an update quickly. And since that’s a prime space for plugging in keywords that recruiters use to find candidates (remember when that used to happen?) what you put there really matters.
Since I was trying to get a marketing job, I went with “B2B marketer with expertise in content, growth, and brand awareness.”
And then I freaked out.
My internal monologue as I stared at my updated LinkedIn profile:
A marketer?
Marketing is who you are?
Since when did selling shit become your identity? What happened to you?
Don’t be ridiculous, you need a job, you can self-reflect when you have a steady paycheck.
But it really doesn’t feel right.
If I don’t say I’m a marketer, how will people find me?
But you’re not a marketer, you just do marketing. You’re so much more than that.
You used to care about things, and people, and have dreams about making the world better.
WHO CARES I NEED A JOB!!!!
That’s when I realized I was ready to stop letting my job title decide who I am as a person.
Why we conflate our jobs with our identity
It’s super common to define ourselves by our job titles.
Fact is, we spend a huge amount of our time at work—about a third of each day, if you’re lucky enough to spend exactly 8 hours trying to stay focused during project status meetings or toiling away at department budget spreadsheets. The more time we spend doing something, the more likely it is that we fold it into our identity.
If you went to school or did a training program for your job, you’ve sunk even more time, and probably tens of thousands of dollars, into that career path. It tracks then that you’d then see yourself as a family physician or science teacher or patent attorney.
If you’re ambitious, making money and getting praise for being good at what you do can also solidify your job as your identity. Got a bonus for winning that big deal no one thought would close? That extra few grand tightens the hold that being a salesperson has on the way you see yourself.
This is reinforced by the fact that, when meeting someone new, one of the first questions most of us ask is, “What do you do for a living?” Even when we’re kids, people’s favorite question to ask is, “What do you want to be when you grow up?” as if that’s the most important thing on 2nd graders’ mind when they’re just trying to smear mud on the family’s Labradoodle.
What’s wrong with making your job your identity?
A career can end at any time, but you’re stuck with yourself forever.
Whole industries have collapsed—or, as tech bros like to put it, have been disrupted—in recent memory. When was the last time you had a cabbie drive you home rather than calling an Uber driver. When was the last time you talked to a travel agent?
If AI CEOs have their way, we’ll be heading that way soon for lots of jobs, from fantasy painters to copywriters to radiologists to software developers. I don’t really believe these companies’ hype about how quickly the change will happen, but it is happening.
Plus, because we have truly abysmal labor protections in the good old US of A, you can get fired or laid off at any time for virtually any reason. Bye-bye to your beloved title of Associate Director of Overthinking and Anxiety.
But let’s say, for whatever reason, you’re not worried about your job. There are human health reasons why you need a clear boundary between yourself and your work:
Bring down your stress levels
Keep yourself from burning out
Live in line with your personal values
Have time for loved ones, friends, and other activities
Make a better workplace for direct reports and colleagues
What do you do if you’ve already made your job your identity?
All is not lost!
The best thing you can do right now is take inventory of how you feel about the amount of space work takes up for you. Here are some free tools you can use to help you get a handle on what to do next:
Understand how deeply your identity is connected with your career with the Career Enmeshment Test by Azimuth Psychological
Reassess your values with the VIA Character Strengths Survey
Book time to talk with me about your identity being wrapped up in work
So is my personal identity crisis over?
I guess so? “Marketer” stayed in my headline until, quite honestly, I started writing this. What I have now isn’t perfect, so I expect to mess around with it indefinitely.
What I have done is adjust how I think about what my career means to me. Now, I think of work as something I do, not who I am. And I’m happy with that change.
Need some help dealing with career boundaries?
Let’s talk. It’s not easy to reframe how you think about yourself in relation to work. That’s what I’m here for.
Work In Progress is a newsletter written by Teagan Kuruna for people who are fed up with the state of work. I write about the real human experience of working and how to stop letting your job ruin your life. Subscribe for free to receive new posts and support my work.